Dementia

  This is one of the harder topics so many of us face.  It is not death that causes me fear but the process of dying.  My aunt is one of the dearest kindest people I have ever known.  She has always taken care of others and reached out to help anyone in need but now she can no longer care for herself.  Still she tries to care for those around her, wanting to make sure I have a bed to sleep in and something to eat whenever I walk into her home.  This past week her dementia worsened to the point that for her safety we have to have someone stay with her at all times. Gratefully one of the ladies who normally comes in a couple of hours a day has agreed to move in with her.  My aunt is still very cognizant of her surroundings most of the time, so when we told her that her helper needed a place to live she was quite happy to help her by opening again her home to someone in need. 

  We were able to take her out to meet one of her dearest old friends for lunch today and it was pure joy seeing them smile together.  We arrived at the restaurant with my aunt in plenty of time before they got there though so I had time  to help her eat - because her fingers, that earlier in life rebuilt houses and cared for me and my children, were not able to hold the fork  long enough without cramping for her to eat.  It was a Mexican restaurant that we have always enjoyed with her, yet her comments so many times about how wonderful it was to find pure Mexican food in town were a delight to hear, knowing she was happy with the moment.

 She has a small dog that sits continually by her side, or in her lap, loving her and helping keep her warm -but also barking like crazy in warning, protecting her from the world, whenever anyone comes to her door.  This constant companion is amazing in the strength he gives her.  It was hard to leave this wonderful woman, who says thank-you and shows gratitude for the smallest things around her to take the three hour return drive home, thinking and hoping for a next time when I can wrap my arms around her and let her know how much I love her.  I will rely on my calls when I can hear her wish me blessings,  "God Bless, and have a good life."